Parenting Children

I try not to watch The Rachel Ray show but sometimes you are held hostage in front of the TV for hours while you nurse your baby. I was watching an interview with Leah Remini from The King of Queens. She comes off as a tough New Yorker but she let on that she is a pushover at home. Who is bossing her? Her four year old daughter, Sofia.

“I’m very consistent; I give in,” says Leah. She says that her daughter runs the house, and her. Her one problem is getting her daughter to give up the bottle. She gives her six or more bottles a night!Setting limits and having rules lets your children know you care for them as much as refilling that bottle at 3am. Get tough.
I know you can do it, just put a little New Yorker into it!

Leah Remini, parenitng, parenting children, moms, setting limits for kids

According to the National Center for Health Statistics as many as 1 in 100 females between the ages of 12 and 18 have anorexia and by their first year of college, 4.5 to 18 percent of women have a history of bulimia. Eating disorders begin at a very young age mostly by age 13. These illnesses are most common in girls but boys can suffer as well.

Anorexia Nervosa is an irrational fear of being fat and thinking you are fat when you are thin. People who are anorexic starve themselves existing on little to no food. Anorexia may be a single episode with large weight loss within a few months followed by recovery, or it may develop gradually and persist for years. The illness may go between getting better and getting worse, or it can steadily get more severe. Symptoms include: refusing to eat, excessive exercise, dry brittle hair, weakness, having no menstrual period, obsession with calories.
Bulimia is characterized by binge eating and then vomiting. This can happen as much as a few times a day to a couple of times a week. People with bulimia can usually maintain a nearly normal weight, so it may be hard to realize your child could have a problem. Symptoms include: using laxatives or enemas, using the bathroom after eating, eating in private, excessive exercise.

Both types of eating disorders are commonly found in children who have low self esteem, and are hard on themselves, they expect perfection. If you suspect your child has an eating disorder seek medical help immediately. Focus on healthy eating and habits.
For more information visit this web site.

[tag] healthy kids, parenting, parenting teens, bulimia, anorexia, eating disorders, eating disorder in kids, healthy eating [/tags]

I am not sure if it is hanging out with their older cousins, hearing kids at the park or just because they are five, but my the back talk has started in our house. From saying “whatever” to us when we tell them it is time for bed or talking back to each other, it almost never ends. I have tried various solutions, read books and researched just what to do when my kids have something to say after I do and I have come up with the following tactics.

Make sure that you set limits and kids know what is not OK to say to you or another adult. When my kids talk back to me, I always let them know it is not acceptable and give them one warning. The next step is a time out. Once you set limits, you have to stick to them. If you give them 30 chances before they get a punishment then they know they can get away with it. Yes it is hard to stick with it but worth it, I promise.
Sometimes I ignore their behavior, it usually stops right away if I don’t acknowledge it. I have told them ” I don’t hear you when you ask that way” That usually gets them asking in a nicer manner.

I also try to acknowledge when they are mad at me or a situation. I tell them it is OK to be mad or upset with me or their sibling and that I understand their feelings. I really try not to be dismissive with them or their feelings.

school age children, preschoolers, back talk, parenting, parenting children, parenting preschoolers, children’s behavior

I was so happy when I finally didn’t have to carry a diaper bag anymore. No more lugging around a huge, heavy bag where I could never find what I was looking for. This time around I am more organized, and I only have to pack for one baby which is a lot easier! Here is a checklist for what you should carry for your new little one:

Diapers- of course! You probably want to stick on the safe side and carry at least 5 of these.

Wipes- again, you want to err on the side of caution. I always carry a lot for dirty diapers as well as sticky hands and faces.
(more…)

In honor of Earth Day we are trying to become more environmentally friendly in our home every day and we are stepping it up a notch today. We do what we can in this house and every month we are trying to do a little more. Educating our kids on Earth Day is one of the things we are doing. Here are some ideas for what you can do with your kids today:

When they are brushing their teeth, teach them to turn off the water while they are brushing. According to the Environmental Protection Agency’s (EPA) Water Sense program, Americans use an average of 170 gallons of water per day. Saving water will help your pocketbook too.

Plant a tree today. Teach your children to respect and preserve the wilderness and wildlife. Buy a bird feeder and bird bath, plant flowers that butterflies like and plant some organic vegetables or fruit. Don’t use pesticides on your lawn or garden.

Visit your local farm or recycling center and teach your kids where their food comes from and where their garbage goes. Make sure you recycle in your home and let your kids help you.

Learn online, check out www.localharvest.org, ams.usda.gov., epa.gov or fishandwildlife.org.
Also check out this website for Earth Day coloring pages.

Finally, get outdoors! Go hiking, camping or to a park. The best motivations for protecting the planet is to enjoy it. What is a better time than Earth Day?

Earth Day, Earth day for kids, parenting, parenting children, kids, earth day activities, earth friendly activities

We are always searching for family things to do. We luckily live in an area of NJ where there are a ton of family friendly events but they are scarce in the winter. A great resource for families are museums. Your children will appreciate them in different ways as they grow and they are perfect for families with kids of varying age differences.

Natural history museums are the best to check out dinosaurs and most kids love dinosaurs. Some great museums are the American Museum of Natural History NY, NY (they have the only intact velociraptor skull!), Museum of L.A. County in California and the National Museum of Natural History Washington, D.C.
Art museums usually have great programs for kids to spark their interest in art. Check your local museum for children’s programs. Let them create their own art when you get home. If you hate the mess, (like I do) then let them paint outside or paint in your husband’s old t shirts. Have them recreate some of their favorite pieces of art they have just seen.

Our favorites are our local children’s museums. My kids never tire of visiting! They can pretend they are a news anchor, learn about electricity and animals and dance on a stage.
Some of the other museums that are cool are the Matchbox Museum in Newfield, NJ, Ripley’s Believe it Or Not Museum Orlando, FL and the World’s Largest Toy Museum Branson, MO.

museums, children’s museums, family fun, parenting, parenting children, rainy day fun, rainy day activities

As I said in my previous post, I forgot so much from when my twins were newborns. I find myself rushing to their baby books to see when they lost their umbilical cord or how much they weighed at their first checkup. I also find myself asking my sister, who has an older son, when my kids should start activities. Here are some guidelines for when to start activities with your child.

Swimming lessons-You should sign up for swim lessons or mom & baby swim classes when you feel comfortable. Let your baby or child get used to splashing around in the water. At age four children usually have the cognitive ability to realize they are in trouble in the water and can do something about it or call for help.

Horseback riding- usually at age five children can have lessons.

Skateboarding and skating-ages seven to eight is good for these skills and they really should be supervised until maybe age 10, especially when in the street. Most “wheeled” injuries occur in children ages ten to fourteen.

Soccer- is the safest sport. Age six is a great age to start soccer although I know they offer it in my town for five year olds, and my kids will play when they are five and a half.

Dancing- I think you are never too young to start dancing and dance class for toddlers will only help with coordination and making friends. A mom and tot dance class is a great way for mom to burn off some calories while bonding with her child!

You can ferberize, co-sleep or practice attachment parenting. What ever you do for and with your new baby I bet you second guess and question it at least in the beginning, if not every step of the way. I came home from the hospital with a quiet, sleepy, beautiful baby boy. Now that baby is 4 weeks and one day old and the sleeping part is getting harder to accomplish and I wonder, “Am I getting this parenting thing right?”

I have lost my memory after five years and I have forgotten what it is like to have a newborn again. I came home with K and I thought “it is OK to hold him, you can’t spoil a newborn”. Now as the days grow longer and he sleeps a little less each day I wonder: when is it time to put him down?
He seems to want to be held all day and while I would love to hold him, studying his tiny face and features trying to memorize every second of his life so I can replay it in my mind when I am an old woman, I just don’t have that time. Nobody has all of that time. I have five eyar olds to make lunch for and play with, I have laundry and calls to return.
Do I soothe him by placing him in the swing to the vibrating seat to the play mat? Do I let him fall asleep in my arms after he nurses?

I want my baby to learn to soothe himself or pacify himself, but when does that lesson start? At birth? Two months? I surely don’t want to miss the boat and have it be too late.
I want him to be a great sleeper (what parent doesn’t want that?!), but is that a learned habit or are you just born with it?
So parents, tell me: just when do you put the baby down?

babioes, infants, sleeping, ferberizing, Ferber method, putting baby to sleep, spoiling a newborn, newborns, parenting, parenting children, fussy babies

Kids love to play in water. If you are a parent, you know that already. we have even let our kids run around in their clothing in the rain. You are only young once and what is the harm of a little water? here are some ideas for fun with water for your kids:

-Squirt shaving cream into a disposable muffin tin. Add a couple of drops of food dye into each cup and stir. (only use a small amount, you don’t want a green kid after soaking for awhile!)
Let your kids paint themselves and the walls. Hose them and the walls down when everyone is done!

-Help your children build boats and rafts from craft sticks, Styrofoam blocks, aluminum trays, egg cartons, etc. Put your boats to float in a wading pool, sink, or bathtub.

-Pair off children and have them face their partner. Have the kids toss a water balloon to each other. Every time the balloon is caught the child that caught the balloon takes a step back. When they miss they usually get splattered with water.

-If you are having a sun shower break out the slip and slide, you don’t even need the hose!

-Play “tag” with the hose. Who ever gets “hit” with the spray of water from a hose or a water shooter is it.

-Use eyedroppers to drip watercolors on stiff clear plastic. Let the paint dry in the sun, then hang the art in a window.
With a Group

-Dig for worms outside, there will be plenty on a rainy day.

It wasn’t until a couple of months before I gave birth to our third baby that I thought about diapers. When I was pregnant with the twins, it wasn’t a thought, we would use disposables like everyone else did. Now we are trying to be more “green” and Earth friendly so I did decide to look into other options and share what I found out with all of you.

Cloth diapers- usually sells for about $1.25 per diaper which is more expensive up front but will save money in the long run. Of course there are more expensive ones that have pretty fabrics and are easier to put on with velcro instead of using pins. Those can run you up to $15.00 per diaper. Cloth diapers require more, care. The contents need to be dumped into a toilet and then put into a bucket waiting for wash day.
A little too “crunchy” for me.

Disposable diapers- These will run $.20-.25 per diaper but you can get them for as little as $.17 per diaper if you clip coupons, watch for sales and order online in bulk. They are the most time efficient to put on, take off and no washing! These are the most environmentally unfriendly because they end up in landfills and don’t break down for hundreds of years.

gDiapers- These are the newest and trendiest “cloth” diapers on the market. They are $27.00 for a starter kit and run $.37 each for replacement pads. They look like regular cloth diapers but they are flushable! A huge plus but make sure you have a good toilet, because these can be a plumbing “don’t”! They are the most expensive choice I found but the most earth friendly.

Which diapers do you use for your child?

diapers, diapering, gDaipers, cloth diapers, cloth diapering, parenting, parenting children, infants, babies

Sometimes I just get bored with sandwiches. Sometimes I just don’t have deli meats or bread in the house. (Hey, cut me some slack I just had a baby!) My kids get bored with sandwiches every day too, so I try to be creative and unique with lunches, or dinners for that matter, and give my kids variety and it gives them an opportunity to try new foods too! Here are some of our favorite ideas:

Veggies and dip. Put string beans in a hallowed out pepper, bake some pita to make your own pita “chips” and if your kids hate raw veggies cook and cool them first.
DIP
1 greek plain yogurt (7oz)
1 garlic clove, pressed
3/4 teaspoon salt
1/2C mayo
1 tablespoon dill and mint chopped
1/2 cucumber
1 teaspoon lemon juice

To make:
Grate the peeled and seeded cucumber and squeeze dry in paper towel and add to bowl
Add the rest of the ingredients and combine
Serve with veggies

Try chicken salad or egg salad in a lettuce leaf instead of bread
Try hummus or guacamole (two of my kids favorites) instead of dips
Go pick your own at a local farm, your kids will be more likely to eat the veggies if they see where they are grown and pick them themselves!
Don’t forget about edamame, kids love these and you can even buy them chelled in teh frozen section of your grocery store

What are your favorite substitutes for sandwiches or traditional lunches?

kids, healthy kids, healthy lunches, feeding kids, parenitng, parenting children, kids health

Since I had my twins in 2003, I have had three pediatricians. We lost one when we moved and the new one here left a bad taste in my mouth. You rarely got to see the doctor and the physician assistants or nurse practitioners were rude and would question me on things like my vaccination choices and the occasional use of a bottle for my two year old son. So, now we are on our third kid doctor!

I know that doctors are only human, they make mistakes and have their own opinions. I know that they don’t always know the newest procedures or medications, only the ones who chose to read and/or learn about them do. I don’t have a problem telling a doctor what I want or don’t want, or questioning them on why they want to do something especially when it comes to my children.

A recent article on CNN talks about when it is OK to question your pediatrician’s advice. I think questioning your pediatrician is fine especially when it comes to opinions on parenting, like when to take away a bottle or pacifier. That is something, I think, is up to the parent and the child since no child is the same. Ask for different options, if your doctor is not willing to give you any then change doctors. You need to find a good fit for you and your family.
Do you question or interview your doctors before choosing them and do you question their advice?

pediatricians, choosing your doctor, choosing a pediatrician, pregnancy, infants, kids, parenting, parenting children

Today is World Autism Awareness Day. Now the autism rate is 1 in 150 births compared to 1 in 10,000 in 1983. The rate of autism in New Jersey bosy is 1 in 6, so you can see why I am scared. Does it have to do with the amount of vaccinations given, what is in the vaccines or the environment? I am not sure, scientists are not even sure, but something has to be done.

A new study in the April issue of Pediatrics, looked for early autistic behaviors, though not specifically for a diagnosis of autism, in premature infants who were born at a very low birth weight, about 3.3 pounds. It found that several factors associated with these early births were linked to a positive result on an autism screening test. They studied 91 babies who weighed less than 3 pounds at birth. MRIs were done on these infants around the time of their birth. At around 22 months, the researchers conducted an autism screening test, called the Modified Checklist for Autism in Toddlers or M-CHAT.
Twenty-five percent of these toddlers tested positive on the M-CHAT, suggesting that they had an increased risk of developing autism. Factors included lower birth weight, lower gestational age, being male, having an abnormal MRI, being ill when delivered, an infection in the mother before birth, or the mother experienced hemorrhaging during labor and delivery.

Are you scared about autism with your children? What do you think the causes of autism are?

For more information on autism, check out this web site.

autism, world autism awareness day, autism in kids, premature babies, premature infants and autism, preemies and autism, parenting, infants, vaccinations

I have to admit, I was a little naive about breastfeeding. I knew it would be hard and tiring. I knew it could be a struggle and not be as “natural” as I would think it should be. It has been two weeks and I am tired and confused. I think I need a live in lactation consultant!

My son had a tight frenulum, or a tongue tie. That is where the small piece of skin under the tongue does not allow to tongue to extend fully, causing problems eating and speaking, so yesterday he had that piece of skin cut and corrected by the pediatrician.
Yeah, I waited in the waiting room because that was too much for me.
I thought this was the problem with our latch, and it very well could be, but when should it get better?

The last few days though, it is if the baby has regressed and is not latching on properly. I can go to breastfeeding support meetings, but they are only on Fridays. I called my insurance company to see if they covered a lactation consultant coming out for a visit, but of course they do not.
I am watching proper latch on techniques online and reading everything I can about it, but having someone help you is just so much better.
I am still trying to breastfeed and it is a struggle.
Now I know why so many women give up.

Did you have any problems breastfeeding? What advice would you give me about breastfeeding?

breastfeeding, tight frenulum, tongue tied, nursing your kids, nursing, infants, new moms, latch on, troubles latching on, parenting

Finally our baby is here! Through all of my trying to have a VBAC, nothing worked so we went in for a repeat c-section on March 18th, one day before my 40th week. I thought I would share my baby’s birth story here with all of you.

I woke up that morning not nervous at all, although I did not sleep much that night. I left the twins with my mother in law and went to the hospital with E and my mom. We checked in and I gowned up ready for my surgery. I still was not nervous at all. Things moved very quickly from there, I answered questions, got my IV, had a quick sonogram to see where my placenta was located and E got gowned up as well. Then we were off to the operating room.
This is when the panic set in.

E wasn’t allowed in the room until we were ready for the surgery, so I was getting my epidural alone. I was scared, since I had never had an epidural before and once I started to feel the pins and needles in my legs I freaked out. I actually started uncontrollably laughing because it freaked me out so much to have people moving my legs, whcih I could feel but have no control over my legs. The doctors were finally ready to operate and then E came in. I started to cry as soon as I saw him from excitement and fear. E calmed me down and helped me to really not have a panic attack which was right around the corner.

The operation was faster then I expected, and 10 minutes later our son was born, breaking the record of the first 8 c-section that morning all of which produced girls. He is my largest baby weighing in at 9lbs 2 oz and 20 and 1/4 inches. He is named after my father and my husband and is an amazing baby. He only cries to eat, which is often but for short amounts of time. He is very cute and his older brother and sister love him.

Breastfeeding has been …..interesting. I hate that I question everything, is he getting enough, when will he want to eat next, is he still hungry etc. Questions that I didn’t have when I bottle fed my twins. It is demanding and tiring but I think we are doing OK since he gained 5 oz in 3 days. Let’s hope he keeps up on this trend.
So far so good with our new addition, we couldn’t love him more and he really completes our family.

birth story, pregnancy, repeat c-section, parenting, breastfeeding, infants