Parenting Children

Breastfed babies maybe at much higher risk of vitamin D deficiency in the winter.
Vitamin D is manufactured by the Mom in their skin in response to sunlight, and pass it to their babies in breast milk. In many part of the country Moms produce little if any in the winter. Dark skinned mothers also have a harder time making the vitmain because of the amount of melanin in their skin.
Talk to your doctor or pediatrician about taking supplements of the vitamin.

vitamin D, infants, breastfeeding, babies, parenting

This post is for my new baby friend, Isabella, and her Mom.

Babies are born into a world where everything in unfamiliar to them. being out of the womb is new territory for them. It is hard for them to go to sleep and stay asleep.

Unlike a parent who cherishes your sleep, babies do not feel the same way. Not only do they resist going to sleep, they resist staying asleep
Of course, they will sleep if you are holding them and you need to take a shower, and fold laundry and answer the phone, but you can’t move because the baby just fell asleep.

Babies may also cry and protest at bedtime because they do not want to be separated from their parents and they feel scared or unprotected. Cross-cultural studies have shown that babies who live in cultures where they are carried most of the day and where they sleep next to their mothers at night seldom cry when it is time to go to sleep. Instead, they nurse to sleep or they become calm in response to the rhythmic breathing of an adult lying beside them. A human infant, like other primates, is genetically programmed to respond to adult care. If you lie down next to a baby at nap time or bedtime*, you may notice a lot less resistance to going to sleep.

* remember, while co-sleeping is a highly debated issue, it can be a SIDS risk.

bedtime, sleep, nap time, sleep habits, infants, babies, sleep refusal

Some of my favorite things to talk about is shopping and children.
Surprise!
I love all the tiny, cuddly things you can buy for newborns, but some of my favorite things made my life easier as a mother.
Here are some of my favorite things for babies and toddlers.
(more…)

According to a study from Columbia University, a couple’s risk of miscarriage is three times greater when the man is between 35-39 years old then if he is younger then 25.
This is regardless of the Mom’s age.

Also, a new report in the Archives of General Psychiatry, Dads over 40 are nearly six times more likely to have a child with autism then men in their 20s are.

biological clocks, Dads, autism, miscarriage

So many children are diagnosed with asthma these days. I now my kids are at risk for developing asthma because I have it. Dust and allergens trigger asthma attacks often and one place that gathers lots of dust is your children’s stuffed animals.

I try to wash ours in a pillowcase often, but some toys don’t fare too well after a wash and tumble.
Now there is a first line of toys that meet the standards of the Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America. They are sturdy enough to take a ride in the washer and dryer and come out better then new.

Check out the toys and the retailers that sell them here.

asthma, allergens, stuffed animals, allergy symptoms,

Paper Plate Turkey
You will need :
paper plate
brown paint or crayons
construction paper in different colors
glue

-Have your child color or paint a paper plate brown.
-Cut “feathers” out of the construction paper and glue them to the underside of the paper plate
-Cut out a turkey head, neck and feet and glue them to the plate
-Draw a face on your turkey

crafts, thanksgiving,

Did you see Oprah yesterday? She had a woman on her show that said she has cracked the code of babies cries. She has narrowed a few sounds made by the baby down to cues, that she says is either for discomfort, hunger, gas, need to burp and sleepiness.

She has a dvd coming out in a week with all of the sounds and what their meanings are.
I know that my kids had different cries for different meanings but this is amazing.

If I had a newborn I would buy this video in a heartbeat.

babies secret language, infants, crying, babies,

Evolution of Mom
The Evolution of Mom

Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here, some of the ways having a second and third child differs from having your first:

Your Clothes -

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.

The Baby’s Name -

1st baby: You pore over baby-name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favorites.

2nd baby: Someone has to name their kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you.

3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger falls. Bimaldo? Perfect!

Preparing for the Birth -

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.

2nd baby: You don’t bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn’t do a thing.

3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.
(more…)

Kids these days have their days filled. Not just with school but their days are scheduled way before they even enter a school for the first time.
There are gymboree classes for the 6 month old, dance classes, playdates, storytime, spanish classes, art and music sessions and gym once a week.

With all of these classes when do kids have time to just be kids?

Some of these classes promise to give your kids a “leg up” on learning. Promises that your kids will be smarter, are on every toy, every class flyer.
Do these kids have an advantage? Does it even matter?

My kids have been to gymboree and gym classes but it was more for me then them. I needed to get out with them, I needed the stimulation as much as they did.

In the future I will sign my kids up for activities, but every minute of their four year old lives will not be scheduled. I will let them have free play at the park, playdates with friends from preschool and just be kids. I think kids need to develop their imagination as much as their mind.

So, tell me, do you think we are over-scheduling our kids?

over-scheduling kids, kiddie classes, toddlers, kids, playdates

Here is a cute, easy craft that kids will love to wear and eat!

You will need a piece of shoestring licorice any flavor and a bowl full of any cereal that has a hole in the middle (cheerios, fruit loops).
Tie one end in a knot and then thread the cereal through the other end.
Finally tie the two ends together and you have a healthier type of candy necklace!

crafts, edible necklaces,

I always gave my children massages when they were babies. Even now as a toddler, R will ask for a massage a couple of times a week.
Now there is new information out on massages for babies:

Giving babies massages helps them sleep better, cry less, and lowers their levels of stress hormones, say researchers who reviewed nine studies involving more than 600 infants younger than 6 months of age.

The review authors, from the University of Warwick in England, also found that massages help create a closer bond between babies and their mothers, The Age of Australia reported.

Most of the studies included parents who’d been trained in the correct techniques for massaging their babies. One of the studies found that massage affected the release of melatonin, a hormone known to help sleep patterns. Another study suggested that massage could help form stronger bonds between women with postnatal depression and their infants, The Age reported.

The review appears in the current issue of The Cochrane Library

baby massage, massage

source

A newborn baby sleeps about 15.5 hours a day.
A one year old needs about 14 hours total
A three year old needs about 12 total hours of sleep a day.

sleep, bedtime, naps

My daughter still has a pacifier.
Gah! I know.

She will only use it at night or for naps, but she has given up using it during the day.
We have had the conversations about throwing it away or giving it another baby that was born into our family. The conversation usually goes like this:

Me: Hey, R, you are such a big girl now. Mommy and Daddy are really proud of you doing all your big girl things like going to the potty and to school!

R:Yes, I am a big girl.

Me: Well maybe we should think about giving away your pacifier, because you don’t really need it anymore now that you are so big.

R: ::blink blink::: Ok Mommy maybe I could give it to the babies.

Me: That is a great idea! Ok, go get your pacifiers and you can give them to the babies.

R: I don’t want the babies to have my pacifiers

Me: Ok, well we can throw them out since you don’t need them.

R: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and then she throws herself on the ground crying.

At first she seems open to the idea but when it comes down to throwing them away, she can’t do it and I don’t blame her.

How did you get your child’s pacifier out of their mouths and into the garbage?

pacifiers, toddlers, babies, bad habits

I have stretch marks. Really, who wouldn’t after having 15+lbs of baby inside of them? I don’t really mind them, they are my badges of honor, they remind me of what my body did, how it made two babies at once and carried them until they were ready to be born.
They made me appreciate being healthy and having healthy children.

They are my mommy scars.

I have scars in my heart. Not literally but they hurt as much as if my heart had been cut.
I have had those “Oh my god, where is R, I can’t see her anywhere”
moments. She was never really lost just disguised amongst various other children of varying sizes and shapes.

One year ago something almost, could have, easily happened to L and I have never been the same since.
He wasn’t hurt but the fact he so easily could have been, how quick and easy something could have happened to my baby shook me to the core and I have never been the same.

I have never talked about it to anyone.
I may never.
The knowledge not only makes me feel guilty but reminds me just how vigilant and careful we have to be with our children.
E and I have this common knowledge and maybe it makes us better parents because of it. Maybe it makes us worse parents because we were not careful enough.

Each of these scars I have make me who I am, make me a mother, make me a better person.
For that I am grateful.

What are you parent scars?

parenting, kids, momy scars, parenting scars, parenting stories, infants, toddlers, stretch marks, babies, SAHM, WAHM, moms

Making mom friends is harder then I thought it would be. I live 1.5 hours away from all of my family and friends and it is hard not having someone to do things with or to meet for coffee, play dates etc.

I did typical “mom” things as soon as the kids were old enough, we went to gymboree, story time, the park, gym classes but all the other moms had friends in those classes or were cliqued up right away. I didn’t seem to fit in and I found out the hard way, my people and friend making skills were rusty. After all I hadn’t had to make a friend since kindergarten, since then it was easy as pie.

Lately I have been scoped out by some other mothers at my children’s school. We have exchanged pleasantries, admired our children’s artwork together and even gave a few up and down looks.
I know what that means. I am about to be asked out on a date.
A mom date.

I mean the pick up lines “what play parks do you usually go to?” “which development do you live in” give it all away.
Finding a mom friend to bond with, with kids or without is like dating. You have to see if you mesh, if your kids get along. You don’t want to go too far, too soon, what if she never calls again?!

It is going to be rough but I am willing to date around until I find the right mom for me.
I have to, I just can’t go to Starbucks alone again!

playdates, moms, SAHM, WAHM, friends